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Leicester City Sack "Sex Tape Trio"

Leicester City have terminated the contracts of Tom Hopper, Adam Smith, and Nigel Pearson for their racist sex tape exploits.

On Wednesday, Leicester City FC, which finished 14th in the Barclay's Premier League last season, announced they had terminated the contracts of Tom Hopper, 21, Adam Smith, 22, and James Pearson—the 21-year-old son of manager Nigel Pearson—as result of the players having participated in a orgy with three local women in Thailand in May. The incident became public when video of the orgy—which the players themselves had filmed, and showed all three shouting racial insults at the women—ended up in the hands of the British tabloids.

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"The decision follows the conclusion of an internal investigation and disciplinary proceedings, as a consequence of events that took place during the club's end-of-season goodwill tour of Thailand."

Yes, the players were in Thailand with the rest of the club during a "goodwill tour," the sort that typically includes an exhibition game, visits to the historical and culturally important sites in the area, and a few well-photographed kickabouts with local kids. Typically absent from the goodwill agenda is the production of a homemade orgy film with racially abusive narration.

Leicester City also happens to have two Thai owners, a close relationship with the Thai Tourism Authority, and has "Amazing Thailand" printed on the backs of its jerseys. So while Bangkok's famous red-light district may sound like a fun night of debauchery to a group of affluent kids from England or elsewhere, the Thai Tourism Authority––not to mention Thai people in general––would rather not have their country be synonymous with sex tourism and human trafficking.

"Leicester City Football Club is acutely aware of its position, and that of its players, as a representative of the city of Leicester, the Premier League, the Football Association and the Club's supporters. It is committed to upholding a positive message of community and family values and equality, and to upholding the standards expected of a Club with its history, traditions, and aspirations," the release added.

Leicester would probably want to be known as one of the oldest cities in England, the burial site of King Richard III, home of the largest Diwali celebration outside of India, or even for (according to Wikipedia) having public toilets at Haymarket Bus Station, rather than for being the home of soccer players filming themselves saying things like, "Lick it, you slit eye."

"The Club will make no further comment on the investigation, its finding or outcomes."

The club would rather not talk about orgies ever again.