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Music

Watch This Tween Effectively End G-House

Meet Sophia Grace. She's the 11 year old from Essex who has inadvertently lodged a hatchet in the scene's forehead.

G-house, for the unawares, is what happens when you slap a rapper spitting bars over laid-back house beats. Championed by the likes of Destructo, Wax Motif, and Amine Edge and DANCE, the sound has produced some absolute winners in year or so of its existence within dance music.

That's cool and all, but it doesn't matter now because the movement is over. It's dead. Meet Sophia Grace. She's the eleven year old from Essex, UK that has inadvertently lodged a hatchet in the scene's forehead (by way of The Ellen DeGeneres Show). Sophia likes normal 11 year old things like princess dolls and her friends. The only difference being that she can spit bars like Raekwon. Her new video "Best Friends" shows her hangin' out bossily by the pool, going to K-Mart, playing dress-up—all over a quintessential G-house beat.

You gotta give it to the diminutive 'lil scamp. It's fucking rad. She's no Rebecca Black. Once you get past all the pretty-pretty-princess malarky, the salient bit of information here is that there's no differentiation in quality between the production and vocal performance on this track and some of the most successful G-house tracks around. They are the same thing. Entirely.

Once you find out that an 11 year old is into, can make, and has made the kind of tunes you're into, it's just not the same anymore. Can you imagine being in some sweaty basement nightclub frying on synthetic stimulants, thinking about how badass and edgy you are, and then realizing that Snotnosed Sammy who you babysit is at home on the couch, sucking his thumb and listening to the same music? It's enough to cause ego death or loss of identity… not something you want to experience on a dancefloor.

Don't worry, it's about time you started listening to downtempo anyway.